Tanner and Kassi... happy birthday to you!

Another year, another year older...

times 2!

Tanner is now 21.

Kassi is 17.

Yes I realize that they are holding the wrong pan of brownies.

They thought they were pulling something over my head by doing it.

I just let them do it to make them feel smart!

Happy Birthday!!!

I was thinking that these two kids,

both born on the 6th of March,

4 years apart

both caused me some serious fear on the day they were born.

I had been in labor for days with Tanner.

When he was finally born I finally got to hold a baby first,

only to have him stop breathing.

It was terrifying, to say the least.

The life flight, the trip to Provo from Price and the fear of what would happen.

I remember just watching him for hours once we brought him home.

I love that boy so much.

I guess he isn't much of a boy now.

But I still look at him and see the little boy who stole my heart

and has always made me worry just a little bit more than normal.

And while he teases Kassi a lot,

he thought it was so awesome to get a sister for his birthday.

And the night she was born it was another emergency,

another time of uncertainty.

When I was pregnant with her I would lay awake at night and feel her moving

and imagine the little girl we were so excited to be meeting.

I felt like I knew her so completely before I ever conceived her

and could feel her personality long before she was born.

There were times in the next 3 1/2 weeks after her birth that I wondered if I would

even live to raise her.

I had bled internally for so long that I shouldn't be alive.

The doctors were amazed.

I would hold her, too weak to even walk from the the living room to the bathroom.

But I would look at her beautiful face and dream of who she would become.

She is so vibrant. So amazing! So fun!!!!

I love being around her because she makes life so exciting!

I feel blessed for all I learned because of them.

Every experience in those times taught me faith, and hope...

and I learned incredible love.

Happy Birthday Tanner!

Happy Birthday Kassi!

Thank you for the joy you have brought to my life.

Thank you for making me laugh!

Every year since we have lived in this house we have taken their picture in front of the fridge on their birthday... they always complain about it, but I think secretly they like it!!!

They are just... FUN! I love to see them laughing and enjoying each other's company!

Glad we didn't put 17 candles on the brownies... it took her long enough to blow the two out that were on there....

Little miss drama queen...