'Tis the season for miracles.....

December is the month we celebrate miracles. Especially the miracle of birth. A week ago today we celebrated the birth of our new son. And there are too many miracles to count as we rejoice in his birth.

We were supposed to be at the hospital by 10am. We got there just in time. Everything was going smoothly and I wasn't even nervous as noon rolled around. That was the time I was supposed to walk into the operating room and be prepped for my 10th c-section. As noon approached, the nurse came in and said that Dr. Chambers was held up in another surgery, in another hospital. But plan on 1pm. 1pm became 2pm. The nurse joked that it was all hurry up and wait and watch... as my doctor gets there, something will come up and I will be waiting for anesthesia. Funny how her prediction came true. By 3pm I was nervous and not very eager to go face the knife (so to speak) and had completely scared myself silly. But it was time to go face the music. Thayne and I were taken to the operating room where I climbed on the table and waited to become numb. It didn't take long and everything seemed to be going smoothly, except I was scared to death. I was shaking. And so, I started doing what I always seem to do when I get scared. I pray! And I pray, and I pray. And soon this wonderful calm came over me and I knew it would be okay. Though Thayne did say what he always says before my c-section begins. He said, "You cannot do this to me again!"

My doctor had expected the surgery to take a while. I have never actually watched a c-section but I could see everything reflected in the light above me. So I watched. I was very removed from the whole thing since I knew in my mind they were cutting on me, but since I couldn't feel anything it was easy to convince myself that it was some gross episode of a Baby Story or somehting. I just couldn't help myself. Dr. Chambers kept commenting that there wasn't as much scar tissue as there was last time (yes, because SHE did the last c-section and actually takes pride in her work and didn't leave me a mess!!!) and how easy this was. She said the incision on my uterus was thin, she could see baby through it, but it was holding tight and she commented more than once how she couldn't believe how well I hold up. :) I didn't tell her that this was just one of the many miracles that we have seen in our lives having children.

Nathaniel was sideways (though he had moved several times that I was being prepped.... we saw that thanks to 2 ultrasounds) and his back was up, in a position they say is most difficult to deliver by c-section (I would imagine it would be completely impossible to deliver naturally.... but that's another story!). I could feel a lot of pressure. It felt like somebody was jumping on my belly. It felt like the most wild roller coaster ride ever. Again, Dr Chambers continued to comment on how well it was going. I watched as they were able to get his head out. He had a head full of dark hair and the most adorable little face. I told her to make sure she really cleaned out his lungs. I have had amnios with kids at 38 weeks that showed the lungs weren't mature and honestly, that was my biggest fear knowing I would have to deliver before 37 weeks. At 3:32pm our amazing Nathaniel Adam was born weighing 7lbs 5oz and 19 1/2 inches long. The cord was wrapped all around him, his arms, shoulders, stomach... he moved around way too much before he was born. I heard him cry, and they were cleaning out his lungs good, but I still heard him suck fluid back in. Thayne went over to take pictures of him because our kids were making us crazy waiting for us to send them pictures. What a world we live in today. We can be 3 hours away from our kids, but because of a little thing called a cell phone we are able to take pictures of their brother only seconds after birth and they can receive them. They were jumping for joy. He has the most beautiful features... in a wonderful, handsome sort of way! But he was having problems breathing and they wanted to get him immediately to NICU. I was heartbroken.... but knew he had to get help. I told Thayne to go with him, I would be fine. And I started praying again. We had prayed for weeks that his lungs would be mature and that he could come home with me. I had prayed that after having him on Monday, we would be able to come home on Thursday and all would be well. Yes.... we got that miracle also. When I finally heard anything from the NICU they said that he had been on 58% oxygen, but had weaned down to 21%. But they were talking about him being in the hospital through Christmas. So I prayed harder. Thayne stayed in the room with me (if you knew how bad Thayne hates hospitals, you might even consider that a miracle!). He got up the next morning to go check on Nate while I showered. I was going to see my baby and nobody was going to stop me! They wouldn't let me go the night before. Thayne called me and said that they told him I should get right down there so I could try to nurse him for the 8:30am feeding. Wild horses couldn't have kept me away! I fell in love all over again looking at his sweet face. He is amazing. I am always amazed when people tell me I can't possibly love so many children the same. I think they are silly. I don't love them the same. I grow a new heart everytime I have a new child. He doesn't share my heart with any of the other kids.... he has one of his very own. I sometimes feel overwhelmed, humbled and in awe that I have 15 hearts walking around on the outside of my body. Oh, and by then, he was completely OFF of the oxygen and they were going to watch his blood sugar, wanting me to come every 3 hours to nurse and if we could keep that stable he would be coming to my room that night. They finally brought him to me at 9:30pm Tuesday night. By Wednesday morning his doctor said he looked fantastic and didn't think it would be a problem for him to go home Thursday morning! Still another miracle.

The nurses couldn't believe when I told them I wanted to get up and moving. They said they liked to wait 12 hours. I finally told them I would get up with or without them, but I was washing my face and brushing my teeth. And I wanted to eat. They were worried that I would be sick. I wasn't and ate like I hadn't in days! The kept telling me that people did not recover from a c-section the way I recovered. They couldn't believe how I was up and going. I told them I always did that. That is another miracle. Everything about this pregnancy and birth are miracles. I know it! We have been so blessed. This wonderful little man is so loved. His brothers and sisters fight over him, beg to hold him... I have to get up before the birds if I want to bath him, otherwise his sisters think he is their personal doll and they fight over what outfit he is going to wear and who gets to bath him today. The most beautiful sight happened the other night when Tanner (17) came in at about 10:30pm. Everyone was in bed except Nathaniel and me. Tanner asked if he could hold him while I got myself ready for bed. The lights were all out except the lights from the Christmas tree. I came out of my room and there sat Tanner... holding his little brother, looking at his face, stroking his ear (Nate has Tanner's ears... there is a little bend at the top of their ears and Tanner thought it was awesome that his brother has the same thing!) and talking so sweetly to him. A newborn baby brings a touch of heaven to our home everytime!

So tonight, the night before Christmas, the night we celebrate the birth of our Savior, I am celebrating the birth of my own newborn son, and I am so grateful for the miracles I have seen this month. The house is quiet. Everyone is asleep, or pretending to be asleep waiting on Santa's visit. But my heart is full as I think of all the gifts I have been given. And no amount of money could have ever bought these gifts. Tonight my parents are asleep downstairs and will be here to witness the joy of Christmas morning with my family. My children are safely tucked in bed (except Garrett, but I look forward to his call tomorrow afternoon) and I am married to the most amazing man I know. And by faith miracles happen.... and I knew that it could be this way!

3 days.... and counting!

3 days until we meet this little man that has consumed every heart in our home. 3 days. This is more exciting than Christmas at our house. We went to the doctor Wednesday. I knew that I wasn't going over to have him. It is too early. The 17th is still 3 weeks early but we know we need to get him out then so we are just praying his lungs are developed and he is healthy and ready to come home and meet his crazy family! But every couple of minutes we would get a phone call, or a text message asking if we were staying. We hadn't even made it to the doctor, but they wanted to know if we were staying to have our baby! Then they told us they were just excited and wanted him to come now so they could hold him. Thayne told me he didn't even need a bed, he would have plenty of arms to be cuddled in. Haha, that's funny! Get the boy's bed set up.... he is not being held 24 hours a day! (Okay, he seriously might be held 24 hours a day but I am really going to try to prevent that!)

My doctor appointment went really well. People are so worried about me (which is nice but still....). One of my friend's asked Thayne yesterday if it was hard to convince my doctor to let me come home. He told her it was quite the opposite. She is very positive and sent me on my way saying she would see me Monday!

Monday!!! I can't believe it is almost here. Monday. Between now and Monday I have got to get my house cleaned, bedroom organized, Christmas finished, baby stuff ready, laundry done (yes, I know... it's never done but it is now about neck deep and growing so I really need to do something!) and kids taken care of before we leave. My sister in law is coming out Monday night to do dinner with them. They will love that. I have wonderful friends that will take care of things while I am gone, but oh how I look forward to coming home with our new little man, sitting by the Christmas tree with all of the lights off and just the pretty lights from the tree shining, drinking my mint hot chocolate and looking into the face of our newborn son.... now THAT is something I am looking forward to. I love the look on the kids' faces when they meet a new sibling. I can't wait to have them see him! They all want to be there so badly for this. I can't wait to put him in all of the cute clothes we have just hanging there, waiting for him to come home.

3 days!!! This pregnancy has gone so fast I can't believe it! 3 days! Last night Thayne and I were watching him moving around. My belly was changing shapes, you could literally see him rolling over. And I just kept thinking how amazing this is. After 14 other kids, the 15th can still make me sit back and be amazed at the miracle of life. What a great time of year to be having a baby. A time of year when we celebrate other miracles. This is the best! 14 children, and I always wanted a December baby. The 15th, a complete surprise, and we finally get that December baby. A miracle. Nathaniel.... a gift from God. And he most certainly is!!!!

Where are the elves????

I want to know which union Santa's elves are working for because they certainly aren't doing their job!!! If the little men/women are the workers, why do I feel like I have been hit by a truck, my back is so sore from walking, (the term shop till you drop comes to mind) and then sitting to wrap all of the gifts, for hours yesterday?

Wednesday was my doctor appointment so off we went to Salt Lake. And then we hit the stores. We figured we really were pushing it by not having Christmas ready and it was time to get something done. By the time we got home it was almost 2am Thursday morning. We had shopped, walked, picked out the best deals, and finally I waddled my way to the car and thought I was going to pass out. Thayne and I took turns driving home because we were both so tired. Thankfully the little kids were spending the night with a friend of ours so we got to sleep in until 6:30am. It was blissful. I don't remember sleeping 4 full, continous hours in a very long time. Which only made me more tired!

So, yesterday we hit a couple of more stores here in town, and then I came home to start making my lists, checking them twice, knowing that even if the kids are naughty they are not being left out! :) Heaven forbid they wake up Christmas morning and one have too many gifts to open and another not enough. On top of it all, we had not gotten Garrett's packages sent off to Puerto Rico yet so I spent a good part of the day getting that ready and it only cost $60+ to send it! Couldn't we have just sent pictures???? :) But... back to the wrapping. I wrapped, and wrote down everything I wrapped. And then I wrapped some more. There were times when I needed to get up and couldn't, so I would call Thayne to either pull my poor pathetic self up, or get me whatever it was I needed. My hips hurt. My back hurts. My feet hurt! I need an elf to rub my feet while I do this! They obviously weren't coming to wrap the gifts. I'm just not so sure about the whole Santa thing. He is not the reason for the season, that's for sure. But he sure gets a lot of credit for something he doesn't do!!!! :) I am going to make a complaint. Where I will send it, I'm not sure.... but it will make me feel better just writing one! Kind of like those lists I make. Now I have to watch my lists and hope that I am sneakier than my mom, who made the lists but then my brother and I found them and knew everything we were getting for Christmas anyway! Live and learn... that's what we need to do!!! :)

One week and counting.....

One week to go. Almost to the hour. I can't believe I only have a week left and I will be holding my newest little boy. If I can make it that long. I've had contractions all night. Even staying down isn't stopping them. One week, I can do this! The problem is that I have such a busy week that I wonder how I can get any of it done feeling this way. I haven't even been nervous about the c-section yet. Usually I am awake at night terrified. I'm not yet. I am just so very excited to see this little man, to hold him, to love him. To have him in our home, to be loved by everyone. His brothers and sisters are so excited. His dad is so excited. I am so excited! To be able to celebrate Christmas with a newborn baby is going to be amazing.

One week... we can do this!

100 Santa bags....

Done! Tomorrow is our party at the church. I have got all of the turkeys handed out and my 3 are cooking (we slow cook them all night and they fall apart when it's time to eat... YUMMY!), and got the bags that Santa will hand out after the program all done! Oranges, candy canes and all kinds of chocolate! All I have left to do is decorate, make gallons of gravy, mix up the instant potatoes (hey, I have to peel 20lbs just for my family... there is no way I am peeling enough potatoes to feed 250+ people) and make some pies. I am getting closer to crossing everything off my "Need to do before the baby is born" list. I even packed my hospital bag today. I did NOT get my house cleaned like I wanted but I have a few days to worry about that. Besides, it won't really matter since I will leave home and the kids will still be here so it doesn't matter that it is not the way I want it anyway, right??? I'll keep telling myself that and maybe, just maybe I can be convinced.

Now, if only I could sleep tonight! That would be a real treat!

12 Days to go.....

In 12 days I will be holding my new little boy. 12 days. Not even 12 days because the surgery is scheduled for noon. It is the 5th of December already. Where did the last 11 months go? Who said time could go so quickly? I have done nothing today. I was contracting all day and since I really need to make it 12 more days, I just did nothing. Of course my house shows that I really did NOTHING. Thank goodness for Kailee. She helps me... she makes me take care of myself. But these last 12 days are the busiest of the year. I have a 1st grade program tomorrow night. This is after another important meeting that we have to attend earlier. I need to be on the phone right now following up with plans for the Christmas party I am in charge of on Friday. Calling to make sure everyone that signed up is bringing the pies and salads, making sure Santa has his outfit cleaned and ready, making sure the 100 bags of candy for good (or bad) little boys and girls are ready for Santa to hand out. I have 4 turkeys to cook, decorations to get ready. Saturday is a baptism we are going to, and then Thayne's company party (I am so glad my sister and her husband are going to be there!) and nothing to really wear since I will be 9 days from delivery and getting bigger by the day but no real need to buy any more maternity clothes. The next week will be just as crazy since I still need to shop and pack, finish Christmas shopping (yes, AFTER we get paid again but BEFORE we have the baby... this will be interesting), get the house in order, figure out what we are doing with the kids, make another trip to Utah for my doctor appointment, which will take all day of driving and nothing accomplished but see that I gained 2 more pounds and yep, see ya on Monday, scout pack meeting to which each boy volunteered to take crepes, becauseit is one of our family Christmas traditions, and sugar cookies because that is another tradition. I have to get the video store ready, the new releases in the computer early, the hours sent in to the owner, the laundry caught up, decisions made on what we are doing with the kids while we are gone. I need to get all of their gifts for school parties bought and wrapped and sent in. I still have a blanket to finish. And a bed to get, and a stroller to put together, and don't get me going on how I still need to put together a Christmas box for Garrett in Puerto Rico and get it sent so he will have Christmas there.... does the list ever end???

Is it any wonder why the days pass so quickly and I still feel like I have accomplished nothing???? I think I need to send the kids on vacation and let me get the house cleaned and then spend the next 12 days in bliss of a clean home and no responsibilities. I have people offer to help me all of the time and then say I don't let anyone help. I wonder what they would do if I actually said, "Oh sure, come on over, take the kids, here's my laundry, shopping list, things to get done list, and could you make sure dinner is on the table at 5:30pm?" They would flip. The offer to help is one thing... :) Living life out loud is something completely different!

I'm tired, but I can't sleep. My mind is tired, but it never shuts off. Thayne tells me I need to concentrate on one thing and not stress myself out with so many things at once. Is this just a man thing? Because every man I know makes his list and concentrates on one thing. Don't bring up too many things, just that one and life will be grand. Women think of 6, 7 or 15 things at once (usually depending on how many children they have!) and know that you cannot do just one thing.... it's not possible.

And knowing me the way I do... I won't even take time to relax in the hospital. I just don't. I stay awake looking at the new baby. I can stare forever at a newborn face. I can't sleep because I will miss those precious moments that I will never get again. And I know the minute I walk in the door I will have to share that newborn with more than a dozen other people who will love and adore that new baby. So, I have decided that in about 18 years I might be able to rest again. But I won't count on it! Because by then I could have 18 grandkids to love and spoil!

Choices..... changes......

Isn't it interesting how we resist change? I used to be a 'fly by the seat of my pants' kind of girl. Thayne had been out of work for several months and got word that he may have a job in Milwaukee. MAY! Not for sure... he was told he MAY have a job. We had 4 kids, the 5th on his way. 4 kids 3 and under. And we loaded up the truck, a small U-Haul, the car, and off we went. We were somewhere in the middle of nowhere when I freaked out and stopped him. I asked him what we were doing. He told me it just felt right. Yes, it did! So we got back in and drove. We were there 18 months and it was an experience that made our lives better. We learned things we wouldn't have learned otherwise. We grew together. It was fun. We ate out a lot. It was really cheap to eat out with 4 kids under 3... they ate free everywhere we went! :) haha We moved again to Illinois without a care in the world, and then back to Utah. And then we moved to our current home 14 years ago. And here we have been. And now, the opportunity to change is here. And it sounds tempting. I told Thayne if we only had 6 kids we would have been on the road already. It sounds fun. It sounds scary. All of the things you have to think about now. All of the responsibility. As if 5 kids wasn't real responsibility. Add 10 and everything changes!!!! We lived in motel rooms and moved to several states in one year, but here we are now... stuck in a rut, or at least it feels like that right now. What used to feel like home now feels something similar to a ball and chain. But choices are scary. The what if's are very real. Too many things to look at. Grown up stuff that wouldn't have mattered back in the day when we loaded the few things we actually had to our name and left for lands unknown. Is it right? Is it wrong? Wouldn't it be nice if the answers were always so clear, the future always predictable? Or maybe not. We learned so much when we had to just go and do. Maybe it's just that I am a tramp miners daughter, it's in the blood. The thrill of the change, new job, new life, new friends. So I wonder how it is that my husband inherited that same blood. It's not a good thing when both of us have gypsy blood. Although for 14 years I have kept it under control. Now the gypsy in me is coming out again. Mabye I just am in the last 12 days of pregnancy and I want to do something different with my life. The last year has been tough in many ways and maybe the lure of a fresh start is inviting. Who knows.... maybe nothing will change. Maybe everything will change. Maybe I stay right where I am and make changes in my life that I have been feeling I need to for a long time. Maybe not... who knows. Choices.... changes.... life!

Happy Birthday Kailee Anne

Happy Birthday Annie Belle! 15 years ago today she made me so happy! Well, she actually made us happy ealier than that. Like the day I found out I was pregnant with her! I wanted another baby so bad. Kimi wanted a sister so bad! That is what she prayed for every single night. She had 4 brothers. I prayed for that sister every night. I really shouldn't have been able to get pregnant with her when I did. I had a miscarriage 6 months earlier and had some health problems that didn't seem to want to go away. But in my heart I prayed and prayed for her. And then, at 11 weeks it looked like we were going to lose her. And again at 16 weeks it looked pretty hopeless. And then at 19 weeks and another ultrasound, we got to see a picture of this sweet amazing girl. The u/s tech gave Kimi her own picture of her sister. She came out into the waiting room all smiles and showed every person that would look her new sister! She was due at Thanksgiving. We celebrated Thanksgiving but no baby came. My grandma S was there. My grandma would never fly, EVER.... but we were in Illinois and my dad had called her and asked her who she loved. She told him of course he knew, she loved him, and grandpa. Grandpa passed away before I was even born. So my dad told her fine, she would get her wish to see either us, or grandpa! :) Get on the plane and come, and if you make it, you will be here for Thanksgiving, and if the plane crashes, you will get to see grandpa! Pretty easy solution, it worked and she got on the plane. 5 days past my due date I went to the doctor and after another u/s he said that she was stuck sideways and he couldn't even get her to move. So, we could go in right then for a c-section, or wait till morning. Ummmmm... no brainer. Go in right then. She was tough to get out even having a c-section. But she was wonderful!!! They gave me some meds to relax me after the c-section and I remember them putting her in my arms and me wondering how I was supposed to hang on to her as they wheeled me to a room when I couldn't keep my eyes open. I remember my grandma and mom there, talking to me and me thinking how rude I was to not be able to keep my eyes open. But mostly I remember looking at this perfect little girl that we had waited so long for. Prayed so hard for. Our little Kailee Anne... Annie Belle.

She has grown into the most incredible young woman. She is my shadow, my friend, my helper, the other 'mamahen' in the house. She could run a household at 11 like most grown ups could never do. She is thoughtful and amazing and fun and WOW.... she's 15! She was telling me last night that she can get her learners permit in June. WHAT? June? Is that even possible? When did she grow up? HOW did it happen so quickly. WHY??????? Can't they just stay my babies for a while??? I will be forever grateful for the miracle that she is. She filled a spot in my heart that had been missing and I can't imagine life without her. She held on through all odds and plays such an important part in our family. WOW.... 15!!! What an amazing 15 years.

Happy Birthday Annie Belle! Mom loves you!

The day is set!

We know the date, we know the time... now it's all hurry up and wait! My doctor appointment was yesterday. Little Nate looks perfect and we have set December 17th as his official delivery date. I had been really worried about the 14th, because well, some of my babies have not been ready at 38 weeks, let alone 36 1/2 and it's so close to Christmas that I do not want to have to spend time in NICU with a baby who's lungs weren't ready. But waiting much longer than even 37 weeks makes the best OB's nervous with my history and going on 10 c-sections. Since I found out I was pregnant I wanted the 17th (19th would have been better...which was my grandma's birthday) and so, I feel this is perfect! My doctor is very positive about the whole situation and I am too! Now, to make the 'to do' list and get busy. We have so much to do!

~Church party planned and now have to pull off

~bags to pack

~school programs

~school parties

~get this poor baby a bed!

~Christmas shopping/wrapping to finish.... which kid still needs what and what have we already got for them???? Find THAT list! How does Santa keep track??

~work party, what am I going to wear?

~Two annual community parties, son helping do the fireworks

~will the elves do the laundry or do I have to figure out how to catch it all up again?

~are we taking the kids? If we do, what will we do with them? If we don't, what will we do with them?

~can I make it 17 more days with feet that look like marshmallows???

I could go on....

Last night I was going through his clothes, figuring out what to pack, and Thayne started laughing and said, "Oh, she'll look good in blue!" HUH? What are you saying man, the u/s was clearly a boy, should I show you again???? I still feel like there is a little girl waiting, but everyone seems to think 10 c-sections is a good number to stop at! He laughed again and said that when my mom was saying it would probably be a girl he felt a little shiver and just wanted me to know it would be oh so funny if that happened! Not funny AT ALL! How rude!!! I told him to keep it up and I WOULD be having that little girl... AFTER THIS BOY! Men just think they are so funny, don't they? haha... spend months wrapping my mind around a boy when I felt so strongly that it was a girl. Now I am extremely excited to meet HIM and sweet husband is joking about it being a her. I whipped out the u/s and pointed out to him and the children sitting around laughing that THIS is indeed a boy and let's not start any gender confusion at such an early age! :) My poor little Hyrum is still struggling because he wanted to be momma's boy so he thought he needed a sister to hold his spot.... I assured him that we have a 19 year old momma's boy, so he was pretty safe in his position since they never seem to grow out of it. He then asked if he would be momma's boy when he was 65 even though we have baby Nate. I told him baby Nate would be almost 60 at the time and they would BOTH still be momma's boys. He was fine with that. :) The mind of a child... oh to be so innocent!

So the day is set, the time is coming quickly, we will be having our little man before we can even blink. I need to get busy!!!

Random thoughts....

I am losing my mind. I have to spend a significant portion of each day off my feet to avoid the constant contractions. This morning I had to run girls to the video store we manage and thought I would make a quick trip to the store before I headed home and off my feet. There were 4 bags of groceries so I figured I could just carry them to the car instead of pushing a cart out and then having to push it all the way across the parking lot to put it away. I walked out and saw a man that used to work with Thayne. I said hi, kept walking. He stops, comes back and stops me to talk. As I stood there contracting I wondered why a person would stop an obviously pregnant and uncomfortable woman who has an arm full of groceries to talk. He's an interesting man... and the conversation was really nice. He asked about the kids and told me how much he would have loved a large family, how the kids are so wonderful and he can't believe how the oldest to the youngest just take care of each other and are obviously devoted to one another. That was nice.... it made my heart warm, but it was SNOWING by now and though my heart was warm, I was COLD and my arms ached. He told me that when they raise the two they have he told his wife they are going to adopt. Nice goal.. I would love to adopt one day, but in reality I have 19 years or so left of the babies I have! :) Funny thing? He has a 21+ year old not working, living at home.... so he must be looking into the far future! :) Okay.... see, random thoughts of the crazy pregnant woman.

Also, working at the video store, it is amazing how often people bring their movies in late, even stating that they are LATE, and then complain that they are charged late fees. I mean, REALLY COMPLAIN! Maybe they know if they complain loud enough we will just take the charges off? The funny thing is that the computer keeps track of their rental records, and it shows who is consistantly late. Why do people have to be so complicated and mean?

And can anyone explain why they police in this town drive 54 miles an hour in the passing lane? We are not a big city by any stretch of the imagination, but mornings and evenings are busy, and more than once I have followed a long line of cars, afraid to drive faster than 53 mph, and a police officer in the passing lane enjoying the chaos he is creating. I have not seen the attitude in other officers in other cities or states, just here. It's like they have to take an ego class in order to be hired in this county. It's not just me, many people complain. A friend's son did a report about the officers in this county.... apparently we have more per block than Vegas has. Though there is crime and violence in town, it's nothing compared to Vegas... but they hang out at the local gas station, even seen a few gambling while sitting in there ON DUTY and then make me crazy driving slow in the passing lane. In fact one almost caused a serious accident because well... he forgot to slow down by the hospital and almost caused a wreck. Had it been a normal person, they would have been pulled over. Oh, and I love shift change because the officers are SPEEDING home (okay... I know they are coming off shift and going home because quite frankly I live by at least 4 of them!!! And quite often follow them home!) I told my kids it is really apparent that I am at that awful stage of pregnancy where I have no patience and do all I can to avoid road rage. But why oh why do people push me so??????? :) (Just joking!)

Why is it that it's only been 3 years since I had my last baby but I have forgotten how uncomfortable being in the last weeks of pregnancy can be? Yet I would gladly do it again if I thought I could!

Why does my 4 year old love Hairspray and how is it possible that he can sing the songs from it? And why have my kids had it on 3 times today? Why am I letting them watch it so much? It's not okay. They haven't really sat down and watched it, but it is on in the basement and I can HEAR it, and I have to say that John Travolta as a woman just does nothing for me... he will forever in my mind be linked to Grease and I will not accept him as a heavy set woman! Call me old fashioned!

I also have to question my sanity for getting rid of our waterbed earlier this year and getting a normal bed. Sure we spend a small fortune! But I am sooooo uncomfortable without my waterbed. We had just the right amount of water, and I loved sinking into the warmth and comfort of my bed. All I can think about is how much more comfortable I was in the waterbed when I was 8 months pregnant, and how I ache in bed at night now. And yes, it was supposed to be a top notch mattress... I just LOVE waterbeds. Do you think 9 months is too late to take it back? Get me a waterbed now??? ARGH... I may be sleeping on the couch for the next 2 1/2 weeks.

My mind keeps wandering and needs a good night's sleep. Maybe then I can concentrate on something and not feel like I am going crazy!